Tough Love

My previous post eloquently described my new profound knowledge of Moses’ wisdom in the wilderness. I regret to admit it only took me about 36 hours before the luster of my enlightenment had faded completely and I was ready to be through with my wilderness. Let me pause here to give major props to Moses for his patience. I didn’t last two full days leading myself before I was ready to be all done, and Moses made it forty years leading a grumbling peoples. Moses wins.

Now let us back up to where we left off in the last post… I was decidedly remaining with the Lord, wherever He determined to be. And if that meant the wilderness, then so be it.

But then I began to wonder why of all the places in the world the Lord would choose the wilderness? Why couldn’t we then walk hand in hand to the promised land? What God who loves me, cherishes me, protects me and has my best interest in mind would then determine to simply camp out in the wilderness?! Where is the goodness in that?

… It’s here that I’ll inform you that I write a lot. It’s primarily because I think a lot. And sometimes I will think so quickly that I neglect to remember to pause for listening. So to help this unfortunate imperfection, I write. It forces my thoughts to slow down just long enough to let God interrupt me and respond. It’s a wonderful little system He and I have going and if you’re looking for some ideas, that might be a good place to start.

It was while I was writing all these realizations about how not good a good God felt that He stopped me and asked me to contemplate something. When your child comes home from school and tells you that another kid in their class has been picking on them, your first reaction is probably to march yourself into that school the next day and give the little twerp who hurt your kid a good lesson. If they haven’t already figured it out, you’re going to tell them how fantastic your kid is, how they don’t deserve to be picked on, and how you’re going to make sure that their mother finds out about their poor behavior. But even without kids of my own, I am fully aware that is not always the best solution to the problem. As a parent, you can’t fight all your child’s battles for them. You can encourage them, love them, and give them suggestions or advise about how to handle it, but you cannot always save the day in the way you would prefer most to do so. At some point, your kids have to learn to fight their own battles. And while it may be difficult to watch your kid experience discomfort or pain, you know it is for their betterment. As a parent you can see the big picture.

It was at this point that I began to see what the Lord was up to. I was picking up what He was putting down... He was the parent, and I was the kid. And while it may feel like I am being held out on, like I’m not being provided for or protected like I ought to by my Dad, He can see the big picture. And while this pain still doesn’t feel like it has purpose, or like I couldn’t have learned some of these same things in far different ways, it is preparing me for something He wants to do through me. And whatever that is, I’ll have needed this season in the wilderness to be ready.

Does that make this season any easier? No. Does it add a little more purpose and understanding to it? I think so. My prayer is that it will do the same for you.